5 Ways To Want God More: And a Few Ways Not To

“My tears have been my food day and night” (v. 3a, ESV). 

Many view strong-emotions as a problem to be solved before connection with God can be renewed.  When people saw the Psalmist’s broken-heart, they asked derisively, “Where is your God?” (v. 3b).  As though grief, pain, and anguish cannot exist alongside God’s presence in this world.

However, God chose a man to write this Psalm who was not currently active in his position of spiritual leadership (we don’t know why).  Once upon a time, this man lead others in fervent worship, pointing their souls to God (v. 4).  Now, he seems to feel like an outcast in the worship gathering, where others cannot fathom how the depths of his despair actually call him back to God.

Your strong emotions are a fantastic “thirst indicator.”  They reveal what we really want in any given circumstance (cf. James 4:1-2).  In my case, I longed for support, recognition, and connection on a human level.  

Though our flesh craves all things under the sun, our thirst can only be quenched by Jesus (John 4).  We must use our strong emotions to point us past the upset of the moment, to the desperate need of our souls.

3. Our self-talk will increase our thirst, or squelch it.

Have you noticed what you say to yourself impacts your day?  

I know when I tell myself, “I hate cleaning the kitchen, this is the most disgusting, WORST chore in the house,” then my attitude will continue to stink along with the rancid leftovers buried in the fridge.

In contrast, Psalm 42 describes the kind of self-talk we need to bolster our spiritual thirst.

“Why are you cast down, O my soul, and why are you in turmoil within me?
Hope in God; for I shall again praise him, my salvation and my God.” (Psalm 42:5, ESV)

Allow your strong emotions to exist alongside your relationship with God.  Our emotions are not the enemy, though they often are bearers of bad news.  The bad news may be that we are hiding idols in our hearts.  But, we likely also have legitimate hurt or trauma to grieve.  

Evaluate the information they bring you.  What are you wanting? Where are you hurting? For what does your soul ache?  Bring these questions to Jesus, allow Him to walk with you through the pain and to bring His cleansing. 

As an enneagram type 8, choleric, type-A personality, I tend to drive through things.  Pain? I’ll just keep going. My heart is broken? Suck it up, there is too much to be done. 

Don’t be like me, pushing strong emotions aside too quickly.  

God uses the events of our days to reveal broken places He intends to mend.  Let Him show you where those broken places are.  Sit in the discomfort long enough for healing to begin.  Then sit some more.

And while you are sitting, instruct your soul on where to find hope.  Do not set your hope on pain ending or circumstances changing.  Hope in God!  This is not the whimsical hope of birthdays where we wish our desires to be fulfilled.  Hoping in God requires us to set our wills on waiting for His work and His timing.

We look forward with anticipation because, in the end, we get unfettered fellowship with God.  All in creation will once again be set right, and the longing for Eden in our hearts will be satisfied.  Not because pain, suffering, disease, conflict, and sin will be no more (and they will!!), but because every longing we feel today will be answered and swallowed up in Life. 

Today, sin tells us that things of this life will satisfy that ache.  We chase those things gladly finding distraction and euphoria in their arms.  Yet, our hearts’ ache to renew the union with God for which we were created.  We cannot understand what this means or feels like, so sin twists this ache into desires that place things higher than God in our souls.

So, lean into your strong-emotions.  As God works in the deep places of your soul, your spiritual thirst will increase as He gives us a taste of Eden in our fellowship with Jesus.

4. Communicate with God.

I love the Psalms because they are SO honest about their emotions (vv. 6 & 9). The authors didn’t get the memo to show up to church on Sunday hiding all the difficulties of their week.  They refuse to answer every “How are you?” with a grin and the appropriate “Blessed. Just blessed!” response. 

In this Psalm, the author honestly tells God how horrible and uncomfortable his circumstances feel right now (vv. 7 & 10).  He questions whether God has given up on him (ve. 9-10) and complains right to God about that concern.

I cannot count the number of times I’ve asked a venting friend, “Have you talked with God about that?”  They inevitably reply, “He knows.”  

Dear one, of course, God knows, but Him knowing, is not the same as communicating your emotions and circumstances to Him directly.  Absence from God does not make the heart grow fonder.  The less we talk to God, the less we want to.  

Our thirst for God will ebb and flow with the same intensity as our confidence that He wants us to pour out our hearts before Him (Psalm 62:8). 

If you want to have thirst for God, you have to communicate your feelings and little (or big) life stuff TO God.  You may not want to right now.  Take that feeling as a thirst indicator, and talk to God anyway.

5. Cling to God’s character.

In the middle of his blunt, honest conversation with God, the author of this Psalm pauses to remember God’s character and actions.  He could have picked any number of truths to stand upon when life got crazy, but he chooses these:

“By day the LORD commands His steadfast love,
And at night His song is with me,
A prayer to the God of my life” (v. 8, ESV).

Truth, though often the opposite of our current emotions, forms the foundation of our faith. 

Especially when life circumstances are horrible and our emotions are going crazy – the LORD’s steadfast love carries us through every day.  Every night, His song surrounds us.  What a beautiful word-picture.  Like a lullaby for a small child, God’s grace surrounds us.  We can rest, sending up sleepy prayers.

A focus on God’s character salts our spiritual food, creating even greater thirst {1}.  We see something bigger and more beautiful than ourselves.  John Piper uses the illustration of going to view the grand canyon {2}.  We don’t behold majestic beauty like that to make much ourselves, but rather to be in awe.  

But, self-talk encompassing only our feelings and frustrations, will cause our thirst to wane.  We can become caught up in the difficulty and effectively place blinders over our eyes which will not allow us to see God’s heart for us and His plan for our future.